Written on Sep, 28, 2015
by Robin
Today was bad. It’s a simple statement. I wish I could dissect it further or give some explanation for what happened. I don’t think that it began with today, but it it was one of those days where it comes close to ending…
Written on Sep, 27, 2015
by Robin
I live in Berkeley. I am a mother. It’s a simple equation really. I am a Berkeley mom. We’re a thing, apparently. I had known about it on a low level, but something another mom said yesterday made me Google it. Apparently there…
Written on Sep, 24, 2015
by Robin
I started reading, Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski. This follows reading Esther Perl and Harriet Lerner. Like Esther Perl, this book deals with sexual function, relationships, aging, etc. Something that I’ve been reluctant to write about is my sexuality and its…
Written on Sep, 24, 2015
by Robin
If you’ve read any of my prior posts, then you understand how critical my friend Ted has been to this process and journey. His insights into his own mental peculiarities and treatments, his almost constant availability no matter how busy he might be,…
Written on Sep, 22, 2015
by Robin
For the last months when recounting my depressions to friends, therapists, and the psychiatrist, I have consistently listed this current depression as being as bad as my worst ever other depression, the 1994-1995 graduate school drop out eventual move to the Bay Area depression. I…
Written on Sep, 20, 2015
by Robin
This fishing expedition through my journals for, well, I don’t know exactly, but I guess, insight, fetches more queries than results. The entries address myriad topics but repeatedly the theme is about the failed quest for love. It is as if this younger me…
Written on Sep, 19, 2015
by Robin
For a number of reasons, partially therapy yesterday, partially just thoughts that have been going through my head, and partially because of my faulty memories, this morning I dug out my old journals. From 1987 to 1998 I fairly consistently chronicled my feelings…
Written on Sep, 17, 2015
by Robin
I had a terrible insight this evening as I was limping home from a ‘run.’ I had just read my mother’s letter and was considering the choices that I had made in my life. One in particular is how I blew my interview…
Written on Sep, 17, 2015
by Robin
As Sandy and I soaked in the hottub last night, I asked him how he felt about my sharing this struggle with so many folks, through the blog, through conversation, through numerous chat clients. Sandy is so private, and this story is both of ours.…
Written on Sep, 17, 2015
by Robin
The Lerner book, Dancing with Anger, speaks of relationship patterns that we repeat with partners, co-workers, friends, parents, and children. She suggests that we take time to examine the modeled behaviors that our parents presented for us. She encourages us to speak with…